The Truth Hurts

THE 10 COMMANDMENTS OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH:

1) Serving God as a priest in the Catholic Church only works if you have a penis. God hates vaginas.

2) Only priests can successfully interpret scripture, so don't bother trying it yourself. It will be wrong. Don't ask questions. Follow our interpretations of an ill-translated bible blindly or burn in hell.

3) Embrace your guilt: We give you the Utopian ideal to fall short of because we know you will. We love your guilt. It allows us to control you and keeps you coming back to church every week. We have enough carrots to put on sticks in front of all you horses out there.

4) Attention all married women - have babies with wild abandon. It is God's will. Even if you can't afford or don't want children. It doesn't matter what YOU want. Of course we know the rhythm method doesn't work - but don't tell all the overwhelmed mothers that. We had to give them a placebo method so that'd they'd shut up about how "they don't have the energy for another". Hey, if they get pregnant again, its just God's will and their pain and suffering is their punishment for having (dirty, dirty, sinful) sex in the first place.

5) Even though the bible outright condemns repetitive prayer (Matthew 6:7) - go and pray 10 Hail Mary's and 5 Our Father's and you will be forgiven. God loves meaningless words repeated over and over to Him, while the person robotically saying the prayer daydreams about what's for dinner.

6) Who cares if the concept of Original Sin was made up by Augustine due to his own guilt and that the bible states that there is no Original Sin (Ezekiel 18:20) - we'll go with it; all unbaptized infants will forever be lost unless water is poured on their head! God hates dry infant heads.

7) The Pope is incapable of being wrong, is infallible and all those under him are holier than thou, even those who cover up sexual abuse, Cardinal Bernard Law of Boston who fled to Rome and has a post at the Vatican. He's holier than you, too. The Pope is allowed to give asylum to whoever he chooses. Unless they are a woman, of course.

8) Confessing your sins to God doesn't work - you MUST go through a priest to have that done, even though the priest himself is likely full of sin, as he is human. Oh well, do it anyway - remember, no questions asked. (See #5 for how to be forgiven of your transgressions.)

9) God is great but so is the Virgin Mary, too. Mmmm, ok, just to be safe - pray fervently to both. Oh, and all the saints, too. Sometimes you just can't rely on Jesus to take your calls...you should leave messages with his staff, too.

10) Jesus Christ died for ALL of us and ALL of our sins, saving humankind through his sacrifice of utmost Love. Not good enough; One can only attain salvation by self - you can only save yourself by believing in God, otherwise, enjoy hell. The end.

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Of course, I included an article in this post and it pertains to #1.....

Women's ordination spurs rift: St. Louis Catholics and Jews split after a synagogue offers to host the ceremony.

The Associated Press - November 11, 2007

ST. LOUIS: The Archdiocese of St. Louis and a Jewish Reform congregation are on the same side when it comes to advocating for immigrants and the poor, often finding common ground in a zeal for social justice. But when the Central Reform Congregation offered its synagogue for today's ordination of two women in a ceremony disavowed by the Roman Catholic Church, it drew the ire of church officials and a pledge never again to partner with the congregation. Two women who profess to be Roman Catholic -- Rose Marie Dunn Hudson, 67, of Festus, and Elsie Hainz McGrath, 69, of St. Louis -- are to be ordained by a former nun as part of Roman Catholic Womenpriests, a small movement that began in 2002 independently from the Roman Catholic Church. The Reform congregation's rabbi, Susan Talve, informed her friend and colleague, the Rev. Vincent Heier, who directs the archdiocese office for ecumenical and interreligious affairs, of the decision. Heier told her it was unacceptable. "It's not appropriate to invite this group, to aid and abet a group like this, which undercuts our theology and teaching,'" Heier said he told Talve. The Roman Catholic Church is framed in hierarchy, which sets rules and offers guidance for the faithful. The Jewish tradition has no centralized leadership, and congregations operate autonomously, answering to their own mission statement. It was precisely that mission that Talve and her congregation's board relied on when considering the request of the two members of Roman Catholic Womenpriests. But the ceremony defies Catholic Church doctrine that reserves ordination of priests and deacons to men only. The women say it is unjust and discriminatory. The two women are ignoring the warnings of Archbishop Raymond Burke, who last week said they will be excommunicated if they proceed with the ceremony. Of the roughly 100 women who have been ordained as priests or deacons worldwide in the Womenpriests movement, including 37 in the U.S., only the first seven were officially excommunicated by the Vatican, said spokeswoman Bridget Mary Meehan. Others have received letters from their bishop like that sent by Burke, she said. Talve was in her office when the women approached her this fall. "They said they were looking for a sanctuary, and that got my attention," Talve said. "As Isaiah said, we are a house of prayer for all people." The congregation's board voted unanimously to serve as host, drawing on its core values and principles, which include hospitality and providing sanctuary. Heier and Burke pressed Talve and the board to withdraw their offer, saying the act would "cause pain" to the church. "It's akin to us inviting a group that is contrary to Jewish life," Heier said. "She didn't understand." Heier said he and Talve disagree on abortion and gay marriage, "but this is the straw that broke the camel's back." Talve said she regrets the church is pained by the decision to host the women, but a decision not to would have hurt others. She said hundreds of practicing Catholics have called to thank her for taking a stand. Heier enlisted the help of the larger Jewish community, but the local Jewish Community Relations Council neither condemned nor affirmed CRC's decision. In a statement, the council emphasized the autonomy of each congregation.